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2009: Don't let the door hit you in the #*@ on the way out.

31 December 2009
Here's my year in review.
January: Went to see an OBGYN about getting pregnant with #2. OBGYN sent me to heart specialist, who ran tests and told me I had an abnormal heartbeat. Grandma told me rather abruptly that she was going on a trip with my sister to Europe, a trip that I had wanted to do my entire life. Sparrow turned 1, we all rejoiced that we lived as long as we had.

February: Cardiologist told me that my pregnancy with Sparrow had caused a hole in my tricuspid valve, my heart was leaky and crappy and any blood pressure spikage could kill me. Really Awesome Doctorman Who Specializes Like Crazy In Preemies and High Risk Pregnancies told me DO NOT GET PREGNANT, DO NOT DO IT. Thanks a lot. OBGYN told me thank God I hadn't gotten pregnant, because they would have had to terminate or let me die. Whee!

March: Sparrow teethed, I had strep, an ear infection, and bronchitis. My doctor wanted to know why I wasn't writhing in pain. As an EFF YOU to 2009 thus far, Hawk and I went on a weekend trip to Disneyland. The next weekend I had Essure, a non-invasive sterilization procedure that is supposed to last 15-25 minutes. Mine lasted an hour and a half.

April: Adjusted to the pain leftover from having metal bits shoved into my uterus. Worked on not being overwhelmed by the emotional pain from being sterile. Hawk and I had a bomb dropped on us from the Church, had to adjust to that and decide if I was going to leave or not. Sparrow took his first steps, then proceeded to refuse to walk.

May: We found our awesome townhouse and moved. Sushi (the cat) had to go live with another family after eating our dinner for the last time. (Seriously that cat was insane - it ate bread, jalapenos, anything vaguely foodlike that wasn't nailed down.) Finished my contracting job, took a spur of the moment trip to St. George with my best friend and Sparrow in tow. Sparrow decided he was officially a toddler. Had some brief but intense marital struggles.

June: Had a dog, briefly. Loved that stupid dog and still do. Grandma left on her trip and I was very depressed. Got very sick. Sparrow was cute and did cute baby-like things. I wallowed in despair because I miss England so much. This line from my journal sticks out to me: You know what I could use a break from? Poop.

July: Had a balloon stuck into my uterus and inflated. Discovered the Essure didn't take. Went on an awesome trip to the Pacific Northwest, decided if living in England doesn't pan out I'm moving to Lincoln City and/or Tillamook, Oregon. Dropped Sparrow on his head in the redwood forest, and broke my ankle while falling down a mountain. Sparrow fell out of his stroller two days later and got a concussion. Darn kid.

August: I hate August, because it is hot and I hate hot. Had a tubal ligation since Essure didn't work. Became officially sterile. Found out that my uterus was odd and scarred from the C-section. Sparrow and I took swimming lessons. Sparrow had his first hair cut. Hawk was awesome, as usual.

September: Sparrow discovered that OMG HE LOVES PONIES. Went to petting zoo, started music class. My friend Dove had her baby, beautiful little girl who is still beautiful. Another friend had a baby. Infertility aches. Whine whine, moan moan, eat eat.

October: Took Sparrow up the ski lift and nearly peed my pants/fell to my death. NEVER DOING THAT AGAIN. Was on TV at the baby expo saying how I didn't think Obama earned the Nobel Prize, and managed to not look like a complete moron! Parenting started to become enjoyable after 20 months of hell! Was prescribed Ultram to deal with constant cramping after the tubal. Note: am still on Ultram, and still cramping constantly. Appointment with new doctor in late January. Hawk made me laugh till I puked. Halloween saw us dressed as a knight (Hawk), a princess (me) and a dragon (Sparrow.)

November: Hawk got me dance lessons for my 23rd birthday; my mom got me a beautiful picture of the Salt Lake temple that now hangs above our fireplace. Thanksgiving was awesome. I got to see my biological dad and his family again and hanging out with them is always hilarious. Shopping Black Friday sales with my mom and grandma rocked. Sparrow discovered the carousel at the South Towne mall and is in love with the "neigh neigh"'s. Had to have mouth surgery. Took Sparrow to the zoo and froze.

December: Mouth surgery removed a lump; it was classified as extremely rare and weird. Also, possibly an alien microchip. After recovery, I ate a lot. Had a couple of breakdowns related to medications, am still working on getting the right balance in. Struggled with tithing, but our bishop ROCKS and is a wonderfully kind and helpful man. Sparrow's second Christmas - I didn't finish making his present in time, but he'll get it for his birthday. My Christmas was insanely awesome, with a piano and ski tickets, woot!! Hawk and I celebrated 3 years of marriage. Or rather, waved at the anniversary as it passed by - Hawk was very, very sick and I was busy taking care of Sparrow.

Here we are, the last day of December. In 6 days it will have been 5 years since I left for England. Man, I miss that place. But I do like where I am right now, which is something I haven't been able to say for a long time. I love my little boy and I love my husband, I love our lives and I love our home. I love the possibilities we have before us.

I love that 2009 is over, and you bet your butt I am staying up till midnight to make sure this crappy year actually leaves.

And 2010? You owe me.

Picture a Christmas

30 December 2009
We had a wonderful Christmas. It was a joy to be with my family and Sparrow had such a great time. My mom and Hawk were both very generous in their gifts to me. My mom got me a piano(!!!!!) and Hawk got me two day passes to a local ski resort. I can't wait to go! Sparrow also got some wonderful presents and had a blast playing with all of them. I'm kind of sad December is over - I will miss Christmas!

Apologies for the odd quality of these pictures. I'm still learning how to use my camera.


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This is our Four Generations picture, with my grandma, mom, Sparrow and me. I look like a got hit with a truck. It was a long day.

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Sparrow got his second hair cut over Christmas. Isn't he handsome? (And busy - he was watching a movie and wanted me to get out of his way!)

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This may just be my favorite picture ever.


Hope your Christmas was wonderful too!!

A message from Sparrow

23 December 2009
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Hi, it's me, Sparrow. I'm getting ready to spend Christmas with Mommy, Daddy, Nana, Papa, Great Grandma, and my aunt and uncle. And Nana and Papa's doggies and kitties. We are going to have so much fun! I can't wait! We will probably watch a lot of Little Bear, since that is my favorite show, and we will probably eat lots and lots of yummy food. Do you like my Santa outfit? I like it because it has Santa, and when I see him on my shirt I poke his beard and say "ho, ho!" Mommy thinks that's funny. She also thinks it's funny when I wear her boots. I like to wear them whenever I get the chance - they make great clomping noises on our floor!

We've gotten almost 8 inches of snow the last two days! I got to ride in my sled while Mommy pulled me around yesterday. We stopped after a while because Mommy got tired and was breathing funny and staggering and saying something about me being too heavy. Silly Mommy, I'm not that heavy! Well, I have to go help shovel the driveway now. Have a happy Christmas!

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Yummy!

18 December 2009
We had a good lunch today.

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Mmm, chocolate pudding!

Hey, there's an awesome giveaway going on at Keeper of the Home. But if you win, you have to share with me!

Sparrow Dances

17 December 2009
Check this stinkin' cute kid out! This video was taken at the zoo when we went last month. It was cold. Very cold. So we danced to get warm!

Grrr.

15 December 2009
Sparrow got a new coat this year. I picked it out. My thought process was, "He needs a coat. Hey, this is a cute coat. But it's not very manly. But how many more chances am I going to get to dress him like this? I'm buying this coat."

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Every time Sparrow sees himself in this coat he says "beah? gaah!!!" (bear? grr!) It is hilarious. Also cute, also fluffy and snuggly and squishy and soft. And it is huge on him so he will be able to wear it next year too.

What's more manly than a big grizzly bear anyway?

Better all the time

13 December 2009
In February 2009 when I was first told I could not have any more babies, it was freaking hard. I think I cried every day for a month, and then again for a month after I had Essure. And then again for another month after I had my tubal ligation. I thought it would never go away. Looking at Sparrow's old baby stuff made me die. My friend being pregnant and having her baby made me die. Knitting baby items made me die.

Now it is still hard. There are still days when I curl up in a ball inside and mourn. But it's no longer defining my life. Heck yes I wish Sparrow could have a sibling. I see siblings playing together all the time, or watch shows where brothers have this bond of steel. And I mourn that my son will never have that. It's too bad, but that's just the way it is. We are done, not in the way I would have liked to be, but it's just over. And I'm slowly accepting that.

It helps that Sparrow is getting older and more fun and we're able to do more things, things that we wouldn't be able to do if I were 9 months pregnant or had an infant. It also helps that as Sparrow grows, I am slowly letting go of more and more of his baby things. Most of them are going to people I know, or can somehow keep in touch with, so I can see them being used for a new baby and that makes me feel better. Still hard, but less gut-wrenching.

This post was brought to you by Nyquil and cookies.

I'm sick too.

12 December 2009
Sparrow seems to be over the worst of it. Hawk is all the way better.

So I will let them play while I go die. Bleeeaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!

This is hard.

09 December 2009
Sparrow is sick for the first time ever. That we made it this far is pretty amazing considering he's a winter-born preemie baby and I never was very good at staying inside during cold season.

Hawk had this crap last week and I'm trying hard not to be mad at him for getting Sparrow sick. The only reason I don't have it is because I was on antibiotics after my mouth surgery and they are still in my system.

Sparrow has a runny nose, sneezes, deep pathetic cough that makes him cry, and a sore throat. He's not eating much, but he did enjoy pumpkin cookies for lunch today (with real pumpkin, hopefully there are some vitamins in there.) His hoarse little voice is so freaking sad.

It's been a very emotional day. I can't stand that he is sick and it makes me cry to see him hurting and sad. I spent $60 on medicines for him today - ibuprofen for the pain, a medicinal grade honey syrup with lemon for the cough, Calms Forte to help him sleep tonight, vitamin C gummies, and some immunity blend yogurts. I hope he will get over this soon; having a sick toddler is scary, sad, and frustrating. At least he doesn't have a fever.

Poor Sparrow

07 December 2009
Today Sparrow slipped and fell on his head on a hardwood floor. He cried so hard he started choking. Then he threw up. First time he has ever thrown up, apart from normal baby spit-up.

Poor kid :(

Clearly, I should do laundry more often.

06 December 2009
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What Sparrow wears when he has no clean pants.

Is it bad that I am putting episodes of Caillou on my iPod for Sparrow to watch during Church tomorrow? In my defense, Hawk is sick and I am woefully unprepared to handle a toddler alone during sacrament meeting.

Here's the thing

01 December 2009
I love reading blogs with activities for little ones, especially teaching activities. Blogs like Chasing Cheerios and the Home Teacher (PS, Keri ROCKS).

But I don't think Sparrow is developmentally "there" as far as doing structured activities, be it playing with clay or coloring. Chalk it up to being two months early or to my crappy parenting skillz, but Sparrow's still pretty much only interested in sticking things in his mouth and screaming.

Yay for crafts, I just wish my kid was old enough to do them.

Thankful

26 November 2009
This year I am thankful for:

  • Health insurance
  • Hawk's amazing patience and his wonderful personality
  • Sparrow growing up just a bit - I am now enjoying being a parent more often than not
  • Our beautiful home
  • My friends
  • My extended family and their graciousness, kindness and generosity
  • The Holy Spirit and the yearnings it gives me to do better in all my works and to return to my Father in Heaven someday
  • Hawk's job and my freedom to be a stay at home mom
  • Books
  • Knitting
  • Pie
  • Ad infinitum


Even though 2009 has been the hardest year of my life, I am able to look back and see all the ways in which I was blessed even during the trials. I have a truly amazing life and I don't appreciate it as much as I should, honestly. I hope to work on developing humility and gratitude, but I don't know if I can ever truly express how grateful I am for the wonderful life I lead.

Zoo Trip 2009

25 November 2009
We finally made it to the zoo!! It was very empty and I have never been in the winter so I didn't realize the carousel and train would be closed, sad. Sparrow and I still had fun though. First, we were almost eaten by a cougar that thought Sparrow was a tasty morsel.

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We watched the Mommy and Baby elephant eat and play for a little while.

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We watched the Mommy and Baby giraffe eat and play too.

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The bear stuck his tongue out at us (Sparrow barked at him in response.)

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Sparrow liked the tigers...

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and the small cats...

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but his favorite thing was the slide.



P.S. Sparrow had on a set of long johns plus his warm knit hoodie and overalls, and we ducked into enclosed exhibits every few minutes so he didn't get too cold. On the other hand, I may be a permanent icicle.

Yay!

20 November 2009
Today Sparrow was running around. He turned toward me and started running over, only to trip and land in a full-on split. He looked at me, unsure whether to laugh or cry. I started cracking up, because it was hilarious. So he started giggling, stood up and threw his arms in the air and cried "YAY!!!!!" It was a perfect gymnastics moment.

Our Christmas packages have started arriving. I am so excited for Christmas this year. Sparrow's Christmas Eve jammies arrived today, as did my parent's and grandma's presents. I got a birthday card from some nice ladies at church too. I can't wait till Sparrow's Holiday Outfit comes - it is going to be so cute. Expect a bucketload of picture spam.

Although I have somewhat of a dilemma. I ordered him a black coat from The Children's Place. It's a good casual/dressy coat, and it looks nice and warm. But then on Wednesday I found a coat at Dillard's - and this coat is CUTE. It's dark brown with a kind of furry fabric, a hood with bear ears and bear paw pockets. It is so darling, and I know I am running out of time to dress Sparrow in cute animal themed stuff. I really miss newborn clothing for that fact alone. So I think I will take back the black plain coat, just because he'll have plenty of time for boring black coats later in his life. This coat is cute, and will last two years. And he's just so snuggly in it!

Hawk's work holiday party was tonight. It was nice. Everyone got a nice board game as a present, and the CIO of the company talked for a while and said that the company is doing amazingly well and is growing and doing awesome and no need to worry with the recession. Phew! Hawk loves his work, and I am so happy he does. His company has treated us so well over the last 18 months - almost as well as Walmart did when he worked for them. (Anyone who says Walmart is a bad employer hasn't heard of what wonderful things they did for us.)

All in all, we had a good day. Sparrow and I didn't make it to the museum, but maybe next month we will. I checked out my lip in the mirror today and it is totally black. No wonder I'm still numb in spots. Not really hurting, but still swollen and boy, do I ever miss chewing! I am stuffed from potatoes and broths and puddings but still want to eat because I miss that chewing feeling.

Have I mentioned how excited I am for the holidays?

New Moon and surgery

Surgery went well today. I was in the office, put under, and leaving the office in an hour exactly. I was numb up till my eyes when I first woke up but the numbness has decreased to just the spot under my nose. I can tell I'm going to have one mother of a bruise soon though. I am also growing a beautiful purple spot on my hand where the surgeon tried for 10 minutes to get a needle in and couldn't. And yeah, that was one of the more painful needle sticks of my life.

I'm a little obsessed with anesthesia so it was neat to be able to feel it actually start taking over this time - it started in the back of my head and went forward. And I was only under for 20 minutes, so I didn't get too drugged.

Not supposed to eat anything that requires CHEWING for one week, not supposed to have any salt for a week. Both of these rules have already been broken, much to Hawk's chagrin. I'm being careful, but I'm not living on broth and pudding for a week. I'd kill for some pizza and Chinese food though, which I really can't have because of the acidity.

We went to see New Moon tonight because Hawk's work gave us tickets for a 5:00 pre-showing. So we saw it 7 hours before it opened, how cool! It was good; better than the first movie, not as good as the books. They really did a disservice to Robert Pattinson by showing Taylor Lautner shirtless so many times though. By the time it got to be Edward's turn for showing off his torso, it was kind of a bummer. Hawk, pretend I didn't say that :-)

Tomorrow Sparrow and I are going to a museum, we hope. In the evening it is Hawk's work holiday party. I hope I can get away with chewing a tiny bite of steak.

My Faith Monday - Missionaries

16 November 2009
Today for My Faith Monday we are going to talk about missionaries. In the LDS church, young men usually serve a 2 year mission when they turn 19. I asked Hawk once why he served a mission, if it was because his family expected him to, and he said "no, it was because I knew the Lord expected me to."

A few months ago we had Sparrow's picture taken with him dressed as a little missionary.

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I'm planning on showing him the pictures and talking about what a missionary does and how he serves people and teaches them about the gospel of Jesus Christ, and how we can be missionaries by being examples. I might pull out Hawk's copy of Preach My Gospel (a missionary manual). I'd like to read it anyway, and he should too (Preach My Gospel went into effect the day after Hawk was released from his mission.)

We run into missionaries at Walmart a lot, mostly because we practically live at Walmart, so this will be a good lesson for Sparrow. We also have a cousin serving his mission in Peru right now, so I am stepping up my effort to learn Spanish and teach it to Sparrow so we can talk to Elder Cousin when he comes home. I tried to read the Book of Mormon in Spanish once. I learned to say "to smite." It is "golpear."

A boy and his sled

13 November 2009
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Surgery, again.

11 November 2009
For the last 8 months I've had a little lump under my nose, above my lip. It's hard, but moveable. The dentist had no idea what it was, so he sent me to see the oral surgeon. I told the oral surgeon it was an alien microchip. He agreed.

Seriously, he has no idea what it is, so he wants to remove it. Currently I am scheduled for surgery next Thursday. I think we will probably reschedule for after Thanksgiving though.

3 surgeries in a year. Man, I am so glad we have insurance.

Happy birfday to me!

06 November 2009
What a great day! We hosted playgroup this morning and that was fun. My friend Dove took us out to lunch at a delicious Indian buffet (Gulab Jamm pastry things = amazing) I talked with my grandma for an hour and a half (after talking with her for an hour yesterday; I love how we can just chat about everything and have the best time doing it), then took Sparrow to Nana's house for the evening.

When I got home, Hawk was waiting outside and wouldn't let me go in the house. He took me to dinner at Archibald's. It was delicious! We talked and talked for 2 hours. That's where I celebrated actually turning exactly 23 years and 0 minutes.

At home, I walked in the house with my eyes closed. Hawk turned the lights on dim and when I opened my eyes, I saw that he had set up our tent in our living room! We have never been camping and were talking about how we really want to go when Sparrow gets older, so Hawk took matters into his own hands. We turned on the fireplace, turned off the lights, and turned on my iPod to a "Ambient Rain" soundtrack I have. It was SO cool! I can't wait to go to sleep tonight.

I also got packages, emails, and letters from people very dear to my heart today. It was especially awesome to get an email from my sister in Alabama. Oh okay, and the Ancient Gnome of Alabama (you know who you are!) and his Young and Beautiful Wife too. Thanks guys, you rock!

And in a Happy Birthday gesture from the universe, a thank-you card from my friend Bethany and a bunch of clothes I ordered last week from CJ Banks arrived too. (Also a bill from the IRS but I'm ignoring that.) What great timing! AND we went to the dentist yesterday for the first time since my pregnancy of Barfing Doom, and guess who had no cavities? (And Hawk had six, neener neener!!)

All in all, it was a wonderful birthday. I had a blast and am looking forward to 23!

Sparrow's Halloween

05 November 2009
I'm going about this all wrong. I'm supposed to post Halloween pictures, THEN talk about my birthday. Oh well.

The first thing we did on Halloween was to visit Gardner Village. We've been there once before and thought it would be nice to go back.

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They had cute animatronic witches all over the Village.

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Sparrow was kind of having a tough day.

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We went over to look at the ponies. While Hawk went to get money for a pony ride, Sparrow alternately stared at the kids riding the ponies and cried because I wouldn't let him climb the fence to get to a pony.

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Hawk and Sparrow are concentrating so hard. Again, when Sparrow's ride was over, he had a crazy meltdown of anger, sadness and HAAAATE.

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So we took him into the petting zoo, where he ignored the cow,

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poked the goat,

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and the pony.

fishies
We stopped at Walmart for some things, and while waiting for Hawk to get a hair cut we checked out the fishies. Too bad our cats would eat fishies, because Sparrow stood motionless checking these guys out for ten minutes.

Motionless. Ten. Minutes.

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We finished out the day at Nana's house with cupcakes. Sparrow looks kind of Parisian in this picture with his cupcake mustache and his "'at."

Then it was off to the mall for (failed) trick or treating (mall was out of candy), and finally a late bedtime.


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Birthday surprise!

03 November 2009
I'm turning 23 this week, and while I'm not thrilled about it I've decided not to truly panic about being old until next year :)

Hawk gave me my birthday present a tiny bit early. Tonight we dressed up in nice clothes, dropped Sparrow off at my friend's, and went for a drive. We ended up at the Sandy City Hall and Parks and Cemetery Offices. Were we watching a town meeting for my birthday? Nooo. Were we going to go grave-shopping? Noooo. Were we ghosthunting? Nooooooo!

It was better than all of those things combined!

For the next 4 weeks, Hawk and I will be taking ballroom dance classes! I am so excited! I have always wanted to learn how to dance and am looking forward to some romantical evenings in our living room dancing our hearts out. Tonight we learned some of the foxtrot.

I'm totally uncoordinated so I can tell this is going to take a loooot of practice, but what an awesome birthday present!

(And Hawk said he even has another little present for my actual birthday. I love that man.)

Pumpkin Puppy

29 October 2009


He's actually going to be a dragon for this year's Halloween - I bought this costume on sale today and am saving it for next year. Still, so cute!!

Not a fun week

28 October 2009
This week I've been struggling with pain medication withdrawal, a weird cold that's lasted two weeks, exhaustion that won't go away, and a tantrum-y, molar-cutting Sparrow. And since I went off the pain medication, the constant soreness and cramping is back.

I'm not performing at my best and thus there are many moments that have happened recently that I'm not proud of. Yelling, crying, throwing things... sadly, I've behaved more like a 2 year old than Sparrow.

Mommy guilt is no fun. So many sources say to let go of the guilt, I'm doing the best I can, but what to do when I don't feel like I'm doing the best I can? I know that I could be doing much more than lying on the couch while Sparrow watches Berenstain Bears and Signing Time.

I'll console myself with knowing that my cold seems to be clearing up, I was able to get a new prescription so the withdrawal isn't going to be as bad, when I'm dead I will rest, and Sparrow's tooth can't taunt me forever. Tomorrow is Music Together, something Sparrow and I are both excited and grateful for. Hawk will be attending this week's class, and Sparrow will be dressed up in his Halloween costume for the class!

Let's Analyze

26 October 2009
After taking a break for a bit, I've been trying to build up a year's worth of food storage. Last year with all the economic doom and gloom I got a little carried away buying stuff, but I've been sticking with a "system" that is working really well: only buying $20 worth of food storage a week. But I am having kind of a rough time keeping track of everything I have.

Which is where the Emergency Essentials Food Storage Analyzer comes in. I admit, it was kind of a pain in the butt having to guesstimate on some of the amounts in cans I get, because I have a lot of things that aren't Emergency Essentials brand. But overall, I LOVED this tool. I have entered all my storage items in here and it's saved! Forever! Which means I never have to re-inventory if I just add as I buy/rotate!! IT'S LIKE A MIRACLE!

We're actually doing better than I thought. We have almost 3 months worth of food stored, which is great! Now I just have to keep plugging away with my $20/week plan. I really do love Emergency Essentials and their products. I find their freeze dried food to be awesome and really well priced. Last year I bought cans of freeze dried chopped onions, carrots, and celery and it was a lifesaver when I needed to make a quick dinner! Throw it in a pot of chicken stock with a can of chicken and heat up and it was FABULOUS, with hardly any work.

Which is awesome, because I am nothing if not lazy.

So try the Food Storage Analyzer, because it really does make keeping an "inventory" easier.

Gift Card Giveaway

Not a good day

25 October 2009
I can absolutely understand why some people lock their kids in basements or rooms or walls for years and years and years. If I had a suitable place, Sparrow would be in solitary confinement for the next 10 years.

Trip Tuesday

20 October 2009
Sparrow and I met Nana (my mom) for lunch at Thanksgiving Point. Then we went to play in their petting zoo!

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The Clydesdale horses thought Sparrow's shoes were delicious. Luckily Nana saved them from becoming Pony Lunch.

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We went on a wagon ride. Sparrow thought the horses were so cool!

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These horses didn't bite.

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Sizing up Thanksgiving dinner...

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"What are YOU?"

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Nana and Sparrow went on a pony ride.

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There he goes!

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This is what he looked like the entire car ride home. He was SO tired!

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I love this stinkin' cute kid!

My Faith Monday

19 October 2009
Keri at The Home Teacher came up with this brilliant idea. My Faith Monday is a day where we teach our wee beasties about religious things.

We belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Today I decided to teach Sparrow about temples. We talked about how temples are Heavenly Father's house, and how we have to be clean and pure to go inside. We talked about someday being sealed together as a family. Then we went to visit the Draper Utah temple.



But I forgot temples are closed on Mondays.

Oh well, it was a good trip and we listened to church music on the way there so it wasn't a total bust.



Animal sounds

18 October 2009


He's so cute and quiet and meek in this video because he was exhausted from our big day at the petting farm.

Ode to Hawk

I woke up on Friday morning with a bit of a cold. Sore throat, stuffy nose, extreme tiredness, general cold stuff. But Sparrow and I had plans for the day, so we went up to Ogden to visit my grandma and we played with her.

Sparrow was pretty awful, probably tired from everything else we did this week, and we had to leave the restaurant we were lunching in because he was so bad. Then he had a major flying meltdown in Jo-Ann's while I was waiting in line to get my fabric cut (my grandma had Sparrow at that point and had to take him outside.) Everyone in line was talking about the poor kid who'd gotten hurt. Yeah right. That's my kid, he's just annoying.

Anyway, we got home around 6 and I was DONE. Hawk recognized my done-ness and took over, playing with Sparrow for 2 hours before it was his bedtime, putting him to bed for me, and then! Then! Hawk went out and bought us a new TV-on-DVD set (we've been watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer, it's pretty good) and dinner. We feasted on Cafe Rio while enjoying Joss Whedon's awesomeness.

Yesterday I woke up early and tried to let Hawk sleep in as late as possible, which is difficult when your offspring is loud and cranky. Hawk got up around 10 and that's when I was DONE again. I went upstairs and slept. And slept. And slept.

Hawk is the best daddy and husband ever. Seriously. I slept from 10:30 - 3:30 and again from 5 - 8. And again from 10:30 - 6:30.

Hawk cleaned the house and took care of the kid. I love that dude.

And now I think my cold is 90% better, plus I have caught up on missing sleep for the last year. Woo-hoo!

Beautiful and terrifying

14 October 2009
I am trying to implement a week day schedule for Sparrow and me. For example, Monday is grocery day, Wednesday is library day, Thursday is music class day, Friday is cleaning up day. Tuesday is Trip day. Last Tuesday we took a trip to Sundance for a hike. I heard Stewart Falls is a good hike for a toddler, and decided that we should go.

BAD IDEA. I would love to go next year, but much earlier in the season. The path was very wet and snowy and muddy even though it was sunny. Sparrow was determined to run down the path as fast as he could, and with certain death to one side and his propensity to trip... well, we cut the hike short. As in, we made it about 200 yards and quit. There's always next year.

The scariest part was the ski lift. Sparrow did well on the way up, but he did not want to sit still on the way down. It was easily one of the most terrifying experiences of my life. Also, the boy screams so loud it's a good thing it's not avalanche season. Yikes. Still, I think we both had a relatively good time, and it was neat to see Sundance before it's covered in snow. I usually ski there at least once a year and it was fun to recognize hills that scare the crap out of me when I'm flying down them on two planks of plastic.

Here are a few pictures I snapped while Sparrow was not trying to jump/fall to his death.


Mommy and baby on the ski lift!


Sparrow wasn't quite sure what to think of the snow...


Like I said, cold, wet and scary!


But it was absolutely beautiful. Next year I hope we make it before all the leaves fall off the trees though