Here's my year in review.
January: Went to see an OBGYN about getting pregnant with #2. OBGYN sent me to heart specialist, who ran tests and told me I had an abnormal heartbeat. Grandma told me rather abruptly that she was going on a trip with my sister to Europe, a trip that I had wanted to do my entire life. Sparrow turned 1, we all rejoiced that we lived as long as we had.
February: Cardiologist told me that my pregnancy with Sparrow had caused a hole in my tricuspid valve, my heart was leaky and crappy and any blood pressure spikage could kill me. Really Awesome Doctorman Who Specializes Like Crazy In Preemies and High Risk Pregnancies told me DO NOT GET PREGNANT, DO NOT DO IT. Thanks a lot. OBGYN told me thank God I hadn't gotten pregnant, because they would have had to terminate or let me die. Whee!
March: Sparrow teethed, I had strep, an ear infection, and bronchitis. My doctor wanted to know why I wasn't writhing in pain. As an EFF YOU to 2009 thus far, Hawk and I went on a weekend trip to Disneyland. The next weekend I had Essure, a non-invasive sterilization procedure that is supposed to last 15-25 minutes. Mine lasted an hour and a half.
April: Adjusted to the pain leftover from having metal bits shoved into my uterus. Worked on not being overwhelmed by the emotional pain from being sterile. Hawk and I had a bomb dropped on us from the Church, had to adjust to that and decide if I was going to leave or not. Sparrow took his first steps, then proceeded to refuse to walk.
May: We found our awesome townhouse and moved. Sushi (the cat) had to go live with another family after eating our dinner for the last time. (Seriously that cat was insane - it ate bread, jalapenos, anything vaguely foodlike that wasn't nailed down.) Finished my contracting job, took a spur of the moment trip to St. George with my best friend and Sparrow in tow. Sparrow decided he was officially a toddler. Had some brief but intense marital struggles.
June: Had a dog, briefly. Loved that stupid dog and still do. Grandma left on her trip and I was very depressed. Got very sick. Sparrow was cute and did cute baby-like things. I wallowed in despair because I miss England so much. This line from my journal sticks out to me: You know what I could use a break from? Poop.
July: Had a balloon stuck into my uterus and inflated. Discovered the Essure didn't take. Went on an awesome trip to the Pacific Northwest, decided if living in England doesn't pan out I'm moving to Lincoln City and/or Tillamook, Oregon. Dropped Sparrow on his head in the redwood forest, and broke my ankle while falling down a mountain. Sparrow fell out of his stroller two days later and got a concussion. Darn kid.
August: I hate August, because it is hot and I hate hot. Had a tubal ligation since Essure didn't work. Became officially sterile. Found out that my uterus was odd and scarred from the C-section. Sparrow and I took swimming lessons. Sparrow had his first hair cut. Hawk was awesome, as usual.
September: Sparrow discovered that OMG HE LOVES PONIES. Went to petting zoo, started music class. My friend Dove had her baby, beautiful little girl who is still beautiful. Another friend had a baby. Infertility aches. Whine whine, moan moan, eat eat.
October: Took Sparrow up the ski lift and nearly peed my pants/fell to my death. NEVER DOING THAT AGAIN. Was on TV at the baby expo saying how I didn't think Obama earned the Nobel Prize, and managed to not look like a complete moron! Parenting started to become enjoyable after 20 months of hell! Was prescribed Ultram to deal with constant cramping after the tubal. Note: am still on Ultram, and still cramping constantly. Appointment with new doctor in late January. Hawk made me laugh till I puked. Halloween saw us dressed as a knight (Hawk), a princess (me) and a dragon (Sparrow.)
November: Hawk got me dance lessons for my 23rd birthday; my mom got me a beautiful picture of the Salt Lake temple that now hangs above our fireplace. Thanksgiving was awesome. I got to see my biological dad and his family again and hanging out with them is always hilarious. Shopping Black Friday sales with my mom and grandma rocked. Sparrow discovered the carousel at the South Towne mall and is in love with the "neigh neigh"'s. Had to have mouth surgery. Took Sparrow to the zoo and froze.
December: Mouth surgery removed a lump; it was classified as extremely rare and weird. Also, possibly an alien microchip. After recovery, I ate a lot. Had a couple of breakdowns related to medications, am still working on getting the right balance in. Struggled with tithing, but our bishop ROCKS and is a wonderfully kind and helpful man. Sparrow's second Christmas - I didn't finish making his present in time, but he'll get it for his birthday. My Christmas was insanely awesome, with a piano and ski tickets, woot!! Hawk and I celebrated 3 years of marriage. Or rather, waved at the anniversary as it passed by - Hawk was very, very sick and I was busy taking care of Sparrow.
Here we are, the last day of December. In 6 days it will have been 5 years since I left for England. Man, I miss that place. But I do like where I am right now, which is something I haven't been able to say for a long time. I love my little boy and I love my husband, I love our lives and I love our home. I love the possibilities we have before us.
I love that 2009 is over, and you bet your butt I am staying up till midnight to make sure this crappy year actually leaves.
And 2010? You owe me.